Poems

I wrote a couple poems (I used to write a lot - before I ever had kids. I don't claim these are well written or very good. But they are mine) a few days before the anniversary.
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Untitled (My Boy)

A baby was born

So helpless and small

Blond hair, blue eyes

Your parents, enthralled

A boy full of wonder

Zest for life and adventure

Testing boundaries, exploring

Never willing to surrender

A young man you became

Always learning, always growing

Laughter and games filled our home

Friendship and love you were bestowing

You were a friend to everyone

No stranger did you meet

Your heart was always giving

Even after it no longer beat

How can I define you?

Your essence? Your soul?

Simple words cannot describe you;

Still, that is my goal.

You lit up a room

All you needed was your smile

Never worried about yourself

Although you had many trials

You said math was your language

You loved puzzles and games

Music, computers, even baking

Loving friends just the same

Your family you held dear

Helping dad, sharing ideals

Come to visit, play and share

Helping mom cook family meals

Your sister, you were close

Love of music and marching band

Teasing each other, playing games

Full of love, no demands

For your brother, you were best buds

Racing cars and playing trains

The two of you, so much alike

Always loved to entertain

Do you know how much we care?
Do you know the grief we feel?
You left too soon, so tragically

The hole you left cannot be filled.

Grief, empty, sorrow, sadness

Words don’t do justice to the pain

But the world keeps on turning

We can’t wait to see you again.

Melanie Johnson

3-13-17

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Grief Undefined

A knock at the door

And a look out the glass

How could I have known

This day would be your last?

My balance thrown off

The world, it stopped spinning.

Or maybe, sped up

My ears won’t stop ringing

My heart ripped apart

Bleeding love and pouring sadness

All the words we’ll never speak

I can’t understand this madness!

My soul feels heavy

My mind overburdened

My feelings are all numb

My movement feels wooden

The world appears dark

The cloud of grief turns it grey

My faith and my God

I feel of them quite betrayed

Each day comes and goes

The clock tick tocking away

Time slowly passes on

My heart cries, wishing you’d stayed

I try to be brave

I try to be strong

But I plead with my God

“Why must I go on?”

The days have moved forward

The pain ne’er refined

My life forever altered

My grief undefined.

Melanie Johnson

3-13-17